Crazy in the Hospital

During my last trip to the hospital at the end of August things got a little crazy… literally. I was given a large dose of steroids… a much larger dose than I normally get… several times what I typically get. The steroids help reduce swelling - mostly on the brain so I needed them after the last seizer. The only problem is I reacted to the large dose of steroids with a steroid induced psychosis… I went a little crazy.

Here is what I remember from that time. I thought the room was going to explode and was rapidly expanding... basically stretching… I could see people’s faces literally increasing, widening and growing in front of me. It was scary.

I also thought I was going to die… I thought I was about to leave this earth. As I recall my cousin Mellissa was in the room with me and I kept telling her to make sure she tells Cole I love him and was sorry that I was not going to be here for him.

I also recall telling Mellissa that I was about to join Poppop (my late grandfather). I really thought I was about to die.

There is a lot I don’t remember and I don’t want to know. I have asked my family not to tell me what I don’t recall… there are cretin things we just don’t need to know. What I do know is… I came home with sever scratches on my arm and chest. I have no idea how they got there and again I don’t want to know.

Once home I was having some weird vision changes. I was having what I call mirror vision not double vision but mirror vision. It’s hard to explain but the room would be split in half and would seem as if one side was mirrored on the other. This mostly happened when I got stressed while meeting with doctors.

The second vision change that happened and some people may think this is cool was the room would look like a cartoon. Everything looked cartoonish… it was freaky. This happened when I was watching cartoons on TV with my son Cole. Then sometimes again while watching TV the television would go black and white or a certain image would seem as if it froze on screen.

I think this was remnants from the high dose of steroids… one of my doctor’s thinks it may have been a seizer coming on and the meds stopping it. Either way they are gone now.